Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Incessant Jabberin’

Not everyone has great eye/hand coordination. That’s fine. Not everyone can walk and chew gum. If you suffer from either of the above afflictions you have my sympathy. Now here is another thought, not everyone can drive a car and talk and their cell phone. NO sympathy for those of you who try and make driving hazardous for the rest of us.

Today I observed people that were multitasking beyond the simple Drive and Talk.

What are people thinking? I swear all of this was true. I was on the side of a middle aged ball guy with a paunch – yes I could see into his car clearly and what is he doing when the light turned green – intently picking his nose and jabberin’ I almost rolled down my window and said dude don’t even think about flickin’ that boogie.

I continued on my way down Jeff Hwy. There is a car in front of me going like a turtle, 20 miles in a 35 zone. No school zone, I looked for the signs. I tried to pass her and she kept going over the lane no matter what side I took (3 lanes) she was hogging the center. I thought what the – well I wondered what she was doing. Applying makeup and jabberin’ I almost rolled down my window and told her that she shouldn’t bother with the makeup – it was never going to help her be good lookin’.

The next guy looked like my 5th grade teacher Mr. Baldock who was a truly intelligent man with a propensity for bad breath. This guy is weaving. I thought – utoh a drunk at 8:00 am in the morning. But no, he is shoving that Mcydees breakfast sandwich down his face and jabberin’. I almost rolled down my window and told him to wipe the dribbln’ off his shirt – but thought better of it as it would create yet another multi task distraction.

Finally I am in the middle lane when out of no where this person takes a right directly in front of me. I would be okay if they had turned into their lane – but why do that when you can turn into my lane in the middle. The person then slows to a crawl in front of me. It does not look like anyone is even driving the car. I could not see a head above the headrest. So I sped up and got on the side of the car. It’s a short teenager listing to music with a lot of base and jabberin’. I’ve had enough so I rolled down the window and told him what I was thinkin'

this is a review and maybe it is a lame ending - so what???

1 comment:

Raspootin said...

Someone, who does not want to get a blogger address and make comments, told me this story was lame and I should say what I was reaaaaaaaaallly thinkin'

F - you got it?

:) anyone with a drivers license or who has driven with my sister knows what I was thinking